PHOTOSHOP CONTEST V: YAK CITY
Wanye
July 24 2012 06:41PM
Above is Tyga - a young star in the Cash Money/Young Money Rap Empire. He has a slammin track called Rack City where he talks about how he will rain down money on dancing girls given half a chance.
After the jump is Nail Yakupov - the newest star in the Rexall Sports/Edmonton Oilers Hockey Empire. He hasn't released a slammin' track that we have heard but the instant he smashes his first goal into the ice hockey net we will start dancing around and doing our best Tyga impersonation yelling "YAK CITY YAK YAK YAK CITY BITCH"
To prepare for this momentus day we want to kick off the fifth photoshop contest in the grand history of OilersNation.
SOME BACKGROUND
If you have recently been released from long term incarceration or perhaps just completed a thorough scientific study of the Mariana Trench you may have missed Photoshop Contests 1 through 4. They are among some of the most hilarious stuff that has ever happened on this site and we are regularly blown away by both the quality and number of entries in the game.
There was one that talked about how the Oilers management have zero plans beyond tanking the team and praying for good draft picks. Astonishingly this has worked. There was one gushing about Ryan Smyth coming home. There was one wondering what would have happened if things worked out differently at key points in Oilers History. And there was our personal favourite about how our blessed NUUUUUUGE is the cutest lil baby ever and needs to be celebrated as such.
It's amazing how resourceful we have all become in this Mariana's trench of Shitanusly Terrible Hockey isn't it? We have made our own fun like the pioneers did before fun was invented in 1839.
GAMETIME
We are toiling away at Nerd Camp and the laughs are few and far between. So we are going to unilaterally decide the contest and set the terms. We are also going to beg Oodle Noodle put up a $100 Delivery GC for the winner should he/she be from Edmonton and we will put up one of the sacred remaining NationDraft party tee shirts if the winner isn't from the Edmonton area.
WHATS THE DEAL-Y YO?
Let's work on the assumption that Yakupov is a Legendary Gun for the Oilers. Let's also assume that our favourite Tatarian Herdsman loves gangster rap. Let's also assume he is going to be doing his best to run the City one day*
Let's see some hip-hop/gangster themed entries proclaiming Edmonton Yak City. Extra points with the judge if you work in YMCMB gear, photos or any rap related content at all. Bieber gets it - look how swagged out he is in the photo above! Extra extra points if you can use imagery from Edmonton to remind the homesickest person on earth what home looks like again.
The Contest starts today - and ends on Saturday night at midnight. We will put the 5 finalists on the site on Monday morning and we can all have a good laugh and whistle in amazement and then the voting will commence.
Craft your magic and send them to wanyegretz@gmail.com - good luck to everyone involved!**
*Good luck with that
**Good luck with that too
HAIL EBERLE
You stole the fisting
Wanye where did you hide the props buttons?
@Jordan Nugent-Hallkins
Log in...
These are so awesome. I only wish I knew how to photoshop so I could contribute. Unfortunately I can't though. But damn these are funny.
Fat bottomed girls and really crappy music.
It is fitting they're paired up together though...
This is a great contest. Minus the hiphop.
Booooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Yak money money!! now if only i was useful with photoshop
Didn't the Lord of The Rinks Photoshop win a while back? Y'know the one with Eberle as Frodo and Tambellini as Gollum. Or did I just dream that up?*
*sweet Tambellini Gollum dreams
Liking rap is a character flaw, all players who do like rap should not be drafted nor traded for.
Stewie Griffin Bling!!! nice Beebs
That p0rn video has the worst music I've ever heard!
In the last month, I quit my job and bought a new macbook. Got nothin but time and resources. Coincidence? I don't think so!
I'M GONNA PHOTOSHOP THE S#IT OUTTA THIS BI*CH!
@ John Chambers
It is number five on this list from the last contest...
http://oilersnation.com/2011/7/1/smyth-photoshop-contest-entries
Funny seeing that H.O.P.E. graphic. Now that Omark seems to be out of the picture, should it now be H.Y.P.E (Hall, Yakupov, Pajaarvi, Eberle)... I guess RNH is the guy in the fab 4, so is that RHYE ...er, I was never really good at scrabble..
Like Max Powers I know nothing about photoshop. I do, however, know about dry-humping at Chez Pierre's. If that dive is still in operation, I'm going downtown to drop $20 on some fine trim.
@Reg...the place was still rockin' two months ago but beware it's still filled with late night lapdances for all the under the table drinkin' coppers fresh off night shift ...
... I once tossed a dwarf at 'ol Chez Pierre's
hey reg...ever toss a dwarf at chez pierres? it was all the rage there in the 80's
...we be H.Y.P.E.N. wouldn't we? b?
I still miss Ender...
so that was an adventure with the not so double post ...wutzup with this early morning action on ON?
there's nothing wrong with rap/hip-hop... but that's not what Wanye likes. he likes party music.
this is rap:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NAMy2wgwVh0
I thought that video was quite refreshing and innovative . . . Young guy with his posse, hanging out at a nice club, throwing cash around at some hot ladies, wearing MLB/NBA gear .... I think he's on to something here like the last 5,000 rap videos I have ever watched.
I hope Yak doesn't go to Diamonds or Eden and toss all his money from his paycheque like that.
@ Romulus
Ahh, classic J5.
This is also high-quality rap courtesy of a couple Brooklyn poets: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eeTnog5RRQo
Rap... hip-hop... what is this stuff you speak of? Isn't that what convicted tattooed felons and NBA players listen to? Strangely enough, isn't that an overlapping demographic pool?
The Nail is barely legal to drive, let alone live the "gangsta" lifestyle. And what would the Nuge think? THE NUGE?
@John Chambers
You Sir, are a scholar and a gentleman.
I'll save the rest of the posters an infinite series of youtube posts... but here's a couple summer treats:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tw1xKlAkywo
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=to3y3cmWWRY
@pelham grenville
I never tossed a dwarf there but I got a gummer from my wife in the private room.
Do hockey players make it rain at nudie bars or do they make it snow? Nation faithful only make it hail (loonies).
@vetinari
Rap demographic also includes 18 year old caucasian males from upper middle class homes pretending to be from the mean streets.
@Romulus' Apotheosis
As a rap critic and music writer, I feel compelled to chime in and say that Tyga and "Rack City" is as much "real rap" or "real hip-hop" as the boring revivalists Jurassic 5, or Black Star, or whatever anti-mainstream politically-correct pap you guys are claiming is "real hip-hop."
@Renato Pagnani
Thanks ever so much for clarifying that, but WHO CARES?
Rap nerds who are Oilers fans like me.
@Renato Pagnani
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5i5klUrNPQI
here's your "anti-mainstream politically-correct pap"! (haha):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ec9vUmfZk8o
enjoy your Tyga!!
ps. If I wanted party music I would have preferred this Tiga:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aKPolaCOajQ
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o5hSGT5c6fM
pps. sorry everyone else... how bout that Yak!?
Wait a minute....has anyone realized that with the addition of Yakupov and the inevitable deletion of Omark we have gone from HOPE to HYPE?
Is this a bad sign?
@Romulus' Apotheosis
Hey, I like Edan and Black Star and even some Jurassic 5, too, I'm just saying that that sort of rap is not the end-all be-all, or some ideal, of rap music. There's nothing inherently inferior about what Tyga's doing is all.
Back to Oilers:
YAK CITY, BITCH! YAK YAK CITY, BITCH!
This is some tight rap
http://youtu.be/2SD92d-zpUw
Hmmm...new photshop contest at the Nation huh? ...I WILL CRUSH YOU ALL!*
Mwa-haha! *Strokes chin* Mwa-hahaha! Mwa-hahahahaha!**
*"Crush you all" meaning "place a solid 7th out of 9 entries"
**Office Doctor Evil laugh
Ummm... I know that Nail seems pretty easy-going and all that, but does the rap photoshop challenge kinda fit in with that whole Muslim thing he has going on?
Sometimes those dudes have a different interpretation of acceptable social practices and using their image/religious texts/etc. in certain ways... ask Salman Rushdie... things like that... just asking...
Does anyone else enjoy Jordan Nugent-Hallkins user picture? I remember that before it was renney doing a derp face, now its kruger. LOve it!
He plays hockey good - that's all that matters. 2012 here bud, not 1960.
You're missing the point... I'm talking about being respectful about someone's religious and personal beliefs and maybe factoring that into whatever someone decides to create with their entry...
*Crumples up latest sketch. Throws it onto growing pile on the floor. Curses political correctness.*