Stop Me If You Think That You've Heard This One Before

November 30 2010 09:20PM

The clock is down to single digit seconds and you're not surprised that the visiting team is throwing their hands in the air. Minutes ago before a timeout you watched a puck barely reach the opposing goal line for icing and you know that was it; the Leafs were going to lose a faceoff and the puck was going directly into the net.

The OT goal that's a minute of game time away is a foregone conclusion obviously. This isn't the first time you've watched this game and it certainly won't be the last.

As they show Brian Burke facepalming in his box you want to stop watching this team but realize that you just can't. This is probably what it's like for heroin addicts but at least their dollars bring them temporary pleasure.

Stop me, oh, stop me
Stop me if you think that you've heard this one before

Nothing's changed
I still love you, oh, I still love you
...Only slightly, only slightly less than I used to, my love.

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Die Hards v Band Wagon

Eric Johnson
November 30 2010 03:25PM

Consider the bandwagon jumping Leafs fan. They come out en masse every spring for playoff time or can be spied in lesser numbers after a 4 game win streak. With their "suits," "ties" and "actual girlfriends," they strut into the bar and spew what ever regurgitated stats they can remember and claim to have spotted the raw talent of “Blankity Blank” since ‘Blank’ first laced up their "ice blade thingies."

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Game Preview: Maple Leafs v. Lightning

Pension Plan Puppets
November 30 2010 11:28AM





8-11-3, 19 points

13-8-3, 29 points

PP %

15.2%, 21st

23.4%, 5th

PK %

73.1%, 29th

87.5%, 3rd

Goals For



Goals Against



Tonight the Toronto Maple Leafs host the Tampa Bay Lightning. As has often been the case since the lockout, the Lightning are a horrible hockey team at the most basic level: Five-on-Five. During the game's most commom state, the Lightning are among the bottom five teams. Their GF/GA ratio is 0.77. Compare that with a team everyone agrees is terrible, the Leafs, who stand at 0.89. Why are the Lightning doing so much better than the Leafs? Simple: Special Teams.

Someone on this site once remarked that Powerplay Success Means Nothing. He was rightly laughed off the site and...what's that? *checks the site* crap. Well, his myopic view of special teams was corrected with some simple research that highlighted the importance of special teams. A good team will have a powerplay plus penalty kill mark of 100. The Lightning stand at 110.9 which is how they have managed to overcome their atrocious even strength play. The Leafs' 88.3% is on its way to setting a post-lockout standard for special teams' futility.

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Outhustled, Outmuscled, and Outthought

Pension Plan Puppets
November 29 2010 10:55AM


As you can see by the scoreline, Friday night's Leafs-Sabres game was still very much in the balance with just under ten minutes left in the game. Francois Beauchemin was about to waltz into the offensive zone with some speed. Then he decided to make a play the Leafs had made a few times in the third which was to dump the puck back to a trailer who was coming up ice at full tilt. In this case it was Phil Kessel and unfortunately he missed the puck.

You wouldn't think that there was much danger in this play as Kadri is ahead of his man, the other two Sabres are far behind the play, Beauchemin is turning with Patrick Kaleta and Phil Kessel is closest to the puck. Let's see how things went wrong. 

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Steve Lansky
November 29 2010 09:40AM

I have a theory. I keep coming back to it then summarily dismissing it. But, today, I can’t dismiss it. It’s a small theory about why the Toronto Maple Leafs continue to struggle year after year after year. Call me crazy, but what if the players on the team simply can’t stand playing in such a hockey-mad city – but, deep down, they don’t know it?

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