Hey Petter,
Can I call you Pete? How are you doing? I hope you had a great summer. My summer was cool. I went to the batting cages and saw some movies. What did you do? Maybe you went back home to Sweden and did fun Swedish things. I’m sure there’s a lot of fun things to do in Sweden, like, uh…
Anyways, you may or may not know that we posted an article about you earlier today. The Leafs Nation writing staff have been counting down the Top Twenty Leafs Prospects over the past couple weeks, and earlier this morning we posted an article about you being our fifth best prospect.
First, I’d like to say congratulations! Second, that was actually a mistake.
See, when we posted the article, we got a lot of feedback from people on the internet. “Fifth! Wow, that seems a little high!” Even our own writing staff chirped and chatted about how the ranking didn’t make any sense, considering none of us really ranked you that high on our personal lists.
(Shoutout to the TLN writing staff, who were quick with a joke, but didn’t bother to check my math. Love you guys.)
So, I went back to the numbers and punched them in again, and it turns out we don’t like you nearly as much as we said we did. I mean, don’t get me wrong, we still like you! We just don’t “fifth overall” like you.
You’re big, you’re strong, you play a great defensive game, and Steve Spott really seems to like you!
But, you don’t score. Like, at all. I get that defencemen aren’t generally expected to win scoring titles, but still. We’d be happy if you turn out to be a reliable, bottom-pairing guy, but that’s hardly what we expect out of the organization’s “top prospects”.
Point is, you’re actually 10th on our list. That’s a big drop, I know. I’m so, so sorry.
Here’s what the list should actually look like so far…
5 | Connor Brown |
6 | Andreas Johnson |
7 | Carter Verhaeghe |
8 | Frederik Gauthier |
9 | Carter Ashton |
10 | Petter Granberg (That’s you!) |
11 | Greg McKegg |
12 | Fabrice Herzog |
13 | Tom Nilsson |
14 | Tony Cameranesi |
15 | Andrew MacWilliam |
16 | Dominic Toninato |
17 | David Broll |
18 | Garret Sparks |
19 | Viktor Loov |
20 | Rinat Valiev |
I hope that, in this difficult time, you can find it in your heart to forgive me. And maybe even feel good for Connor, Andreas, Carter, Frederik and Carter 2, as they all move up one spot on our list!
Anyways, good luck at training camp! I hear that Old Man Robidas can’t skate, so maybe you’re closer to the NHL than you imagine!
Your friend in life,
Justin Fisher
You idiots
idiots
Petter is a sweet boy! He ranks #1 in my heart!!
what next? Nylander is actually number 4? …… If this guy reads this, probs going to break his heart 🙁
i doubt he even knows this site exists lol
Petter will make you pay for your insolence. His nickname isn’t Robocop for nothing.
Comments 2 and 3 killed that joke faster than Jeffler kills his chances at a second date.
I had nothing to do with this.
I am not proud.
If Granberg plays out of this world this season it will be to prove TLN wrong. If he disappoints it will be because TLN crushed him. Either way, this is on you TLN. Too bad Dallas Eakins is no longer around to read these articles about his players and put out the fires. Hope for the best.
This is hilarious
Well if the Dangle curse is still in the works, Granberg will win the Norris and break into Steve’s house and wack him with his stick 10 times
Way to go Justin. Now he’ll probably demand a trade to Detroit or (shudder) Montreal.
aka Granberg’s same sex boyfriend.