TLN Player Power Rankings: Trade Deadline Edition


It’s trade deadline day and for the 29 GMs shopping at the ACC this year, I’ve done got the scouting report you need right here. We’ve got tons of fine merchandise, and it’s all available. Except for Rielly and Nylander, we’ll probably hang on to them. No reasonable offer will be refused, and receive a Brandon Kozun free with any purchase.

1. NATHAN HORTON (LAST WEEK: NR)

Finally the Leafs have a Horton who doesn’t bring shame to the organization. While it seems cruel to be doing victory laps about a player who has unfortunately had his career cut short, it does not seem cruel to celebrate never having to see David Clarkson in a Leafs uniform again.

2. PHIL KESSEL (LAST WEEK: 6)

Two points against Philadelphia was a nice way to start the week. Of course Phil is always nice.

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3. TYLER BOZAK (LAST WEEK: 12)

If I gave Phil credit for his two point game against the Flyers I guess I have to do the same for Bozak even though he’s not a likeable hockey player (checks the date.) I mean Tyler Bozak is a true number one center that any team would be wise to add for their playoff push.

4. MORGAN RIELLY (LAST WEEK: 11)

Morgan avoided saying anything misogynistic this week and he is unquestionably the Leafs best defenseman. 

My reaction to every Rielly trade rumour that comes up tomorrow…

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5. DION PHANEUF (LAST WEEK: NR)

 Dion finally makes his debut on the award winning Player Power Ranking (I gave myself an award for outstanding achievement in sticking with a topic for a month) and he cracks the top five because he’s a good player on a bad team and he briefly reminded us how he got the contract we desperately want to jettison.



6. JAKE GARDINER (LAST WEEK: 4)

Jake Gardiner falls a couple spots, but still deserves credit for being a good hockey player. He will always be ranked high on this list because people yelling at me about his defensive zone coverage gives me super human strength.

7. JAMES van RIEMSDYK (LAST WEEK: 5)

James van Riemsdyk remains in the top ten largely because the Leafs played the Flyers this week and I’m incredibly thankful that he’s not Luke Schenn. I would very much like to see him traded as I believe he can be a bringer of nice things. That probably won’t happen though.

8. NAZEM KADRI (LAST WEEK: 2)

Nazem Kadri better still be a Leaf on Tuesday. 

9. TIM ERIXON (LAST WEEK: NR)

He’s new here and I want to believe that Toronto is where he’ll finally reach his potential. I also want to celebrate the fact that the Leafs are now a team that make intelligent waiver claims, not Frazer McLaren waiver claims.

10. JONATHAN BERNIER (LAST WEEK: 8)

One very good game, One very bad game, one game watching Reimer. A standard week for Jonathan Bernier.

11. JAMES REIMER (LAST WEEK: 3)

Rumours this weekend that the Leafs might deal a goaltender to the Oilers are very exciting for this Edmonton resident that would like to see Reimer in a starting role and have the opportunity to watch him on the reg.

12. JOFFREY LUPUL (LAST WEEK: 16)

He played in all three games.

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13. ROMAN POLAK (LAST WEEK: 9)

Roman may be the first Leaf since Ryan Hollweg to end his tenure here with a questionable hit. That’s the kind of moxie you want on your blueline in a seven game series.

14. OLLI JOKINEN (LAST WEEK: 10)

His hockey game may be weak, but his google image search game remains strong.

15. DAVID BOOTH (LAST WEEK: 13)

Lee Stempniak was just dealt for a minor league player with some NHL ability. Assuming that there are other NHL GMs who haven’t watched hockey in the past two seasons, we might be able to count on a similar return for Booth.

16. LEO KOMAROV (LAST WEEK: 7)

He’s still here and a lot of you still love him way too much.

17. RICHARD PANIK (LAST WEEK: 15)

I’m not sure if I’ve mentioned this before, but trading Panik would be a Dick move.

18. PETER HOLLAND (LAST WEEK: 14)

Peter Holland fourth line center. Peter Holland misused forward. Peter Holland is one of the reasons why the Leafs don’t have a second round pick this year. Please use Peter Holland better or reap the rewards that a $775k offensive center can bring on the open market.

19. KORBINIAN HOLZER (LAST WEEK: 19)

If his injury in Sunday’s game against Washington prevents Holzer from being traded he deserves consideration as one of the Leafiest Leafs who ever Leafed.

He should be traded to a contender by the end of the day, because nothing says “we’re set for a deep playoff run” like adding Korbinian Holzer.

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20. ZACK SILL (LAST WEEK: NR)

Whatever, he’s gone in 19 games.

DIDN’T MAKE THE CUT

Brandon Kozun, and Stephane Robidas manage to be the bottom of the barrel on a 27th placed hockey team. Trevor Smith is injured and will unfortunately will have to wait until he’s healthy to be waived back to the Marlies. Petter Granberg is down and may stay down now that Brennan is likely ahead of him on the callup list.