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Brad Marchand got really mad online

The first rule of Twitter is the most important one of all — never tweet. Seldom does anything good come from wading into the internet’s garbage bin and engaging with its inhabitants.

If you must break that rule, you really ought to follow the second most important rule of Twitter, which is don’t get mad online. You might be mad, but, since you’re hiding behind a screen, nobody has to know that you’re mad. As soon as you get mad online, you’ve lost. There’s no coming back from that.

Brad Marchand broke both of these rules on Tuesday night. It wasn’t pretty.

If you haven’t been paying attention the past few days, Marchand handed the Philadelphia Flyers a win in front of their notoriously aggressive fans by just skating over the puck in the shootout. Here it is if you missed it. Enjoy watching it, like, one hundred times.

Marchand became the pit of everyone’s joke the next day, with GIFs and screenshots of his gaffe showing up everywhere. In an attempt to show just how unphased he was, Marchand, who had most certainly been cruising the internet and seeing himself get dunked on repeatedly, posted this:

Hey, everyone, look. I won the Stanley Cup like a decade ago. Who cares that I made a complete fool of myself in front of a bunch of fans in Philly? That wasn’t even funny! It doesn’t matter! I’m not mad! I’m not!!!

If that wasn’t enough to show you just how nicely Marchand was taking this whole thing in stride, check out this totally level-headed and normal response he had to a guy making a light-hearted joke…

Yikes! I know he isn’t mad, or anything, but calling somebody a peasant for not being a professional hockey player is a bit much, right! And, come on, nobody is going in their back yard and pretending to be some 5’6″ half-complete-Animorph-looking weirdo. Let’s be real here.

Like I said, getting mad online is a ROUGH look. If you’re going to mess up in the shootout, just take it in stride and don’t log on just to throw a fit about it. Just look at how much better John Tavares handled his shootout gaffe in Philly a few months ago…