What if the Leafs Were… the Avengers?

With the release of the teaser trailer for Avengers: Infinity War today, I’ve begun my usual suffering towards the hype of an anticipated movie. I know the feelings will wear off eventually, but for now it still exists.

So, in an attempt to help it, I’ve decided to combine my love of superhero movies and the Leafs by comparing Leafs players to the Avengers in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Like, all of them, not just the ones on the official Avengers team. I might not touch on every Leaf, or every Avenger, but I’ll try my best.

Duh. Both are American, both are the unofficial leaders of their respective teams, and both give you the upmost confidence that the job will done when they’re on the screen/ice.

Much like Iron Man, Rielly was the original beacon of hope for the franchise. While Rielly’s success or failure probably wouldn’t effect the future of the Leafs like Iron Man’s did with the MCU, they were both the original. Also, Rielly seems like he’s a source to the humour on the team, and while Captain America/Matthews are the unquestionable leader, some people make the argument for Iron Man/Rielly.

Pretty obvious choice. Hulk helps keep the flies off the Avengers, and is the face puncher of the group. While Martin is probably intelligent off the ice, the second he steps on, he loses a bunch of brain cells, but occasionally makes a smart play. Also, anytime you put them alone, they usually suck, but put them in a group of other skilled players, and they thrive.

Both have dashing good looks, luscious blonde locks that were forced to be chopped off by an old man, and are the European of the group. One has the ability to summon lightning at his own will, while the other has the ability to summon the red light as his own will, and they can both bring the hammer down. They’ve also both been exiled to a weaker world/line by the king, even though we all know that they’re truly a god.

Both are Russian, full of secrets, and seem like they could have a fun side to them that they rarely show. Also, one’s hot, and the other is a hot mess.

Both of them are just kinda there. All these talented humans around them, and they’re just sitting there enjoying the ride. Also, both are pretty much useless and are shoved down our throats, and the only way they can be defended is because we have to “think of their family”.

Much like his buddy Iron Man, War Machine has been around for a while, but we keep forgetting about it. War Machine compares to Iron Man because they’re both similar in style, but War Machine’s is a lot more aggressive. Also, if anyone is going to screw up so badly that they lose they’re ability to walk, it’s Jake.

Like Scott Lang, Brown was cast aside early on in his life for one wrongdoing, and was never given a second chance. But one guy believed in him, and let him excel in what he’s good at, and he’s become really good at it. Also, they’re both tiny and red.

Despite being new to the team, both are extremely knowledgeable, and can at times be overpowered. Also, when push comes to shove, we know that they’ll be the one on the team killed off.

Like Quicksilver, Calle Rosen got a very small window to shine before being thrown aside. Their contracts say that they’ll probably be back briefly down the road, but we all know they aren’t as good as the other version of them that exists. Despite their short appearance, both of their exits made us cry, although one was because of a tragic death, and the other was because of a Roman Polak signing.

Another European in the group, they were both on another team before finally joining forces with the good guys, and being the often-scrutinized, but also super powerful backbone to the team. Also, Andersen makes some pretty magical saves from time to time.

Both hard-working soldiers, both of them seem to be hated by everyone, and yet despite that, Cap stays by their side and supports them. Both have made epic falls to their demise (okay, Hyman just falls over a bunch), and both have caused civil wars.

Both are pretty much only here still because of their character and experience, and at this point we’d feel bad for telling them to leave. But, they can be useful from time to time.

Both originate from places that are made up, and both came out of nowhere, but have proven to be legendary warriors. Also, Leo probably is a king of some technologically advanced civilization.

Both are the child of the group, and should probably still be in school. Despite all the criticism about their size, they’ve both proven to be exceptional. Also, despite not being the best or the leader, we all know they’re the most popular.

Both are really good at what they do, and yet no one has ever heard of them. And anyone that knew of them before they were popular are either lying or a really big nerd.

Both love to cause mischief, and were hated by everyone before joining an exceptional team. Despite their obscurity, both have proven to be surprisingly good at what they do, and both have a good sense of humour. If Naz doesn’t work, then Jazzy Kadri can be Rocket.

Both are big and massive, and despite the fact that they don’t look that effective, you still wouldn’t tell them that in fear of getting ripped in half. We all saw them die in the first installation, and yet they were miraculously reborn for the sequel. Also, I’m pretty sure Polak can only say “I am Polak”, right?

Both are experienced warriors, but until recently, they had never gotten a chance to shine. Also, Hainsey seems like a guy who takes everything extremely literal.

This is where I started to draw a blank, so I approached fellow Leaf/superhero lover @PDWhoa for his insight. I’m just going to quote him on this because I couldn’t have put it any better.

“Gamora is an elite efficient warrior, which demands skill. She’s not super smart like a Banner or Strange, but she’s no Drax. This intelligence is what Carrick is known for.”

Also from @PDWhoa:

“Borgman’s more physical play could indicate Gamora better, but I think he’d be a better parallel to Nebula, personally. And the idea of Nebula and Gamora on the bottom pair is fitting. Also, who better to represent the person who has had body parts replaced by cybernetics and technology than the guy with Borg in his name.”

This one’s pretty obvious. He’s the guy that puts the team together and baby sits them, but is also the most experienced and wisest of all. And whenever their gone, the team just fights each other, and nothing gets done.

Both share one common goal, that being to destroy the relationships within the team, and burn it to the ground.